My hair smells faintly of my childhood

My hair smells faintly of my childhood today. I have been swimming in the river again –the river that is a lake and laps the edges of a sometimes sandy beach. Back then, in my childhood, it was just a ditch, an ordinary, concrete slip-ditch used to irrigate farm and orchard. But it originated in the same mountains as the Lake I swam in today.

High up at the Continental Divide, snow melt crashes over boulders with white-water intensity, descending through granite canyons until – as the Colorado River – it reaches a bend in Debeque Canyon where some of it is shunted off into an irrigation canal and finally a ditch. There are two dams to assist in the division of water for irrigation; one is a simple check dam and the other is the more innovative Roller Dam.

Despite the creep of the city limits, despite the city people who know nothing about the care and maintenance of irrigation pumps and the origin of the priceless water that keeps their lawns green, despite the total lack of experience of the city folk to understand siphoning and flooding techniques once used to keep the vanishing orchards productive, the irrigation system exists to this day.

Another thing the new city folks in all the planned developments and subdivisions don’t know is where the water goes after it passes their property. They know little of the small lake half mile away – which now appears as nothing more than a landscape artifact for a community of apartments – and nothing of the lore concocted in my creative childhood mind as I played in that ditch with my five-year-old brother.

On muddy days, after a thunderstorm upriver, that water was chocolate milk; a treat to be released by my brother and me to the children downstream – but only if they had been good. Other days the slip ditch flowed so clear you could see the little minnows. Better yet, you could see to the bottom of the ditch where the rich sediment built up – sometimes four inches deep with dark, mildly stinky, mud.

From this mud, using my hand like the clawed bucket of a backhoe, I excavated batter for my mud pies. Pressed into a discarded tuna can and left to bake in the sun, these cakes could be unmolded the next day and then frosted with additional mud, which made for artisan quality triple-layer chocolate cakes. I remember begging Daddy not to be so particular about cleaning the ditch, not to liquidate my culinary commodities.

My hair was long then, as a child – almost to my waist. My hair is long now, as a senior citizen. Yesterday I swam in the huge lake a couple hundred miles downstream of that childhood ditch – a lake made possible by a 710-foot concrete dam.

It is June. The lake is rising at a foot to 18-inches per day. We’ve been good children downstream and those Colorado folks are releasing all the frothy snowmelt. I swam in the water of the Colorado River – much bigger and broader than the irrigation slip ditch of youth, nevertheless, my hair came out smelling distinctly of my childhood.

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A long and winding road that leads – to beauty.

It was a long and winding road that lead to – who knows where? She had never been there before. But she had just passed through the Kaibab – 41 miles of rolling, forested hills – mountains kneeling, mountains lying down and covered with ponderosa, aspen and mountain meadows. She saw the sign that directed to Point Imperial and Cape Royale. She didn’t need a picture to paint 1,000 words. Those four words were irresistible and she turned left. According to the pocket map provided her by the Park Service Ranger, one has to get a permit to have a wedding at Cape Royale. A wedding? Then it must be beautiful.

Beauty restores. Beauty heals. Beauty comes in many different forms. She needed restoration, healing, beauty, self-care. That morning, she stopped to see friends and acquaintances; a kind word here, an act of service there. But she was empty and it soon became apparent she needed to refill her own tank if she was to serve others. So she sniffed out some nutritional fuel.

The meal was excellent. She tucked a portion away – to go – and planned to polish it off in a beautiful place as dinner. Thirty-seven miles later she stopped at Jacob Lake and then proceeded through Kaibab National Forest and the Grand Canyon North Rim entrance gate. It was then she saw the sign: Cape Royale Road. The road forks after five miles. To the left another three miles is Point Imperial. She tried that first as an appetizer. 8, 800 feet – the highest overlook on the North Rim of the Grand Canyon. Her optimum altitude. Ponderosa pines. Beauty in every direction. Painted Desert to the east. Far below, views of Marble Canyon, and the eastern portion of the Grand Canyon. Returning to the fork, she headed up the right hand branch. Fifteen miles – a long and winding road – not suitable for trailers or long vehicles – plenty of time for a bride to consider her destination. She drove as far as a car can go and parked. On her own two feet she entered the avenue, a paved trail lined with piñon pine and tall, thriving, cliff rose. Until that day, she had never wanted to be a June Bride. June seems so conforming and usual somehow. But oh, if one is going to be a bride at Cape Royale, June is the month to be that bride. Every cliff rose was in bloom. As she walked, she noticed a wall of rock jutting into the canyon on the left. In that wall, nature had chiseled a window, Angel’s Window.

And through that window, in the distance, she could see the Colorado River. Her River. It was a breath-taking discovery.

It was not a difficult hike, nor a difficult drive, but it was a long, long and winding road; and it led to beauty. Her soul was satisfied for another hour, another day, another week. She would survive.

Presentation is part of the nourishment
Presentation is part of the nourishment

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Hiking is good for what ails you

Take a hike, it’s good for what ails you. Especially if what ails you is stress, depression, anxiety, tension, panic, frustration.

Take a hike. Walk until you see something that makes you smile. Something pristine and natural like a mallard duck lifting off from a lake. Something wild like a fox never deviating off course – ignoring your presence. Something comforting like a fawn in the forest or quail noisily gathering their chicks, or a lizard zipping away from your shadow.

Keep hiking until it becomes clear exactly what it is that is eating you or whom you blame for your issue. Work it out with each step. Talk it out aloud to the wilderness. Keep going. Keep putting one foot in front of the other until your brain has stopped complaining and started feeling grateful. Press forward until you reach that crucial moment when you throw your hands in the air and shout “Thank You!” Then, and only then is it time to head back to your point of origin. You are now healed – at least for another hour, another day. Taken daily, this remedy will go miles toward keeping you balanced and healthy. Healthy in mind and soul as well as body. There is hope. Hope that you will be cured of your anxiety.

This remedy may also be found packaged under any of the following labels: bicycling, running, swimming, kayaking. Parent company: Exercise in the great outdoors.

One word of caution: hiking is addictive. You may find it necessary to walk further and further into the wilderness to effect a change in your emotional and mental well-being. But, dear friends, can you think of a better remedy with fewer negative side effects?

Hear me now, there are times when you feel like you are going to die. Your chest constricts. It is hard to breathe from the stress. The tension is mounting in your shoulders and around the base of your neck. Or perhaps embarrassment has joined with anxiety so that you feel as if you want to die. When you feel like you want to die – or when you feel that you are going to die; you must, you must get out of doors and take the cure immediately. Why? Because your last goal, the last thing on your bucket list is to die in a beautiful place. Remove yourself to a beautiful place immediately to position yourself to achieve that goal. Who knows? You may recover instantly. It has happened to me time and time before.

Ideas other have suggested as remedies for panic attack caused by anxiety or depression: Now I ask you, cannot all these be accomplished via a good hike?

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