Category Archives: Those who can teach

It’s a Book: Precious Journey releases at long last

It is an allegory. It is steampunk. It is a little bit novel. It is now available from Amazon and other major book distributors – also from your favoite bookstore – ask for it. Here is a sample of my favorite characters and my favorite chapter.

Stalking the Sleuth

Traveler was being followed.  He sensed it from the moment he exited the train.  It was a new sensation. For the traveler, open and transparent as he was, was still used to being nearly invisible, sleuthing from the sidelines.  It did not feel like a malicious sort of stalking, it was more like shadowing, anticipating. For instance, how did this person whom he had not yet seen – merely felt the eyes and their constant following of his every move – how did this person know he would be on the train? Traveler had not known himself whether he would drive or ride until a few hours before departure. Traveler stood for a moment on the station platform and wished he had his Convie. What am I thinking, he asked himself.  I have two sturdy legs and walking is so beneficial to clarity of conclusion.

Followed or not, he was hungry. He turned into his favorite establishment on the wharf and ordered a basket of fish and chips and half a pint of the local ale.  Fishing nets and colorful floats adorned the walls. Over the years, hardwood floorboards had been worn to a patina by the constant comings and goings of locals and tourists.  Places this popular rarely have extraneous personal space. Every inch was shared with a constantly undulating crowd.  Traveler was no sooner seated at a table then he was joined in quick succession by three other persons, two male, one female, constantly in motion changing places like musical chairs as an order number was announced or someone spied a friend, waved, and changed position.

Receiving his order, Traveler closed his eyes and savored the fried sea aroma curling up from the steam. Another basket slid onto the table and a sinewy male eased expertly into the neighboring seat.

“What is your interest in my sister?”

            Traveler looked up into cool and intelligent blue eyes and held their gaze for a few seconds.

“Sean Journey, analyst,” said the man, extending a hand.

The traveler shook hands silently, reached for the malt vinegar, fingered a chip and waited.

“You show up in the city and ask background questions of the flakey receptionist. Next, on a road trip, you stop at a little café that just happens to be owned by my parents.  No doubt, they gave you volumes of information couched in opinion. Assuming you were capable of distilling the information from the opinion; your next stop was obviously here, where my sister spent some of the most enjoyable and enlightening years of her life.”

“You have tracked me this far, including following me from the train station. You are an analyst.” Traveler met Sean’s eyes again and continued, “You have to ask what my interest is in your sister?” he paused. “I wear a trench coat, I have a fedora, how is it you did not assume I am a private investigator hired by the man himself to track Precious?”

“Puh!” The analyst nearly spat. “That man never had a modicum of initiative. He could find her easily enough on his own if he cared to take the trouble.”

“He wants her back.”

“He wants her to come back, you mean –without him lifting a finger.”

“You have a close connection with your sister.” It was a statement, not a question.

“My sister is kind and caring. Growing up twenty months apart, it felt like we were twins. She protected me. She is a very loyal person.”

Traveler began, “You say Precious is kind, caring and loyal.  It seems so out of character for her – from what I have learned of her character – that she would leave the man.” Again, it was an observation, not a question, and the traveler took time to bite off a portion of batter-dipped cod and chew thoughtfully.

The analyst fetched a checkered napkin, wiped his mouth and again made eye contact.

“Precious has an Achilles heel.”

Traveler raised an eyebrow.

  “She can’t help rescuing people.”

“That is the compassionate thing to do,” shrugged the traveler.

“Once she rescues them, they make her feel responsible to care for them. When she draws a line and is no longer responsive to plaintive whining, they accuse her of being insensitive.”

Traveler thought back to the helpless wail that first drew his attention to the cave.

“How did she come to connect with the man in the first place?”

“It was here, at the Western Conservatory of Earth Studies. Precious had a work-study assignment in the botany department. She was building the terrace at Salt Park.  It looks out over the bay. The botany department was eradicating noxious weeds and studying plants native to the area. The man, as you already know, was a botany student.  His field study and her work shifts overlapped.

“She was cute.  She had a fascinating set of tools, so he followed her around like a puppy. And she responded to his needs, encouraging him, complimenting him, building him up.”

“So Precious encourages people and builds them up?”

“Yes, she is always adapting and giving the benefit of the doubt. As a result, people depend on her.”

“It is a credit to her strength of character that your mother has not prevailed on her to move back home.”

“Yes. And one of the greatest disappointments of my mother’s life to find that they are not joined at the hip in every opinion.”

Salt Water Park

Traveler’s basket was empty. The two men rose together in a sort of natural synchrony and headed out the door. Traveler set a course for Salt Water Park and Sean Journey fell into step beside him.

“We have dined together with perceptive conversation,” stated Journey, “but you have not yet identified yourself and your interest.”

Again Traveler mused on the oft-asked question. He preferred not to answer directly. There is no succinct and simple way to reply; “I am a traveler, scribe and cycloptic seer for the core.”  It leads only to complication. First, most people think you are joking. The common man, meaning the majority of homo sapiens populating the earth, would guffaw and snort, “You think you go around seeing Cyclops?” Sean Journey was a human of no ordinary intellect. He had shared honestly. The ball was now in Traveler’s court.

“I am a traveler, scribe, and cycloptic seer for the core,” he replied.

“Meaning you work for the Cranial Reservoir,” stated Sean. “Why the qualifier, cycloptic?”

“I am a visionary of only one eye,” said Traveler.  “Were I to see with both eyes, I would be omniscient, omnipotent. As it is, I observe wisdom. I am able to see imperfectly into the behavior and motivation of others. Once glimpsed, the motivation and personality fascinates me. I travel to ferret out the needed wisdom for each relationship observed.  I scribe. The results of seeing and scribing are uploaded to the global Cranial Reservoir – all the collected wisdom of the ages.”

“You upload directly to the Cranial Reservoir?” queried Sean.

Traveler smiled, “There is a good bit of residue and affinity for the past in me.  I first make my notes on papyrus tablet. The very act of writing is stimulating to thought – therapeutic to confusion. Once I reach the conclusion, my results teletransport to the core cranium.”

“They pay you to upload facts?”

“Sometimes hard facts; more often truth couched in myth.”

“I have accessed the Cranial Reservoir many times in my profession – more often in the classifications of military behavior.”

“My work is about relationships.”

As the analytical silence grew, the men sat musing with similarity of mind. Sean absently caressed a Michaelmas aster and then hefted a black volcaniclastic rock the size of a bowling ball. Fire glass.

“All that rot about Precious loving rocks inordinately? The goblin princess accusation?” said Sean. “Precious loves rocks for what they are, a normal part of our earth surroundings. She also, as you know, loves jewels and gold and silver – for their excellence. The man, he tends to objectify.  He loved rocks only because they were pretty – and because Precious was good at rocks.  He is a covetous being.  He craves for himself everything someone else has.  Precious was naturally gifted with the ability to know just which rock fit in which space as she built that terrace with our father, Petros. Then, she went to college and graduate school to find out the latest techniques for identifying gold and minerals.  The man, on the other hand, absorbed Precious’s successes for himself along with appropriating her tools.  He seemed to think whatever Precious did, he could do better just because he was the masculine portion of the team.  He wanted to stay home and enjoy rocks without having made any effort to learn about them.”

Again, Sean and the Traveler rose from their flagstone seats in tandem. As though with one mind, they headed toward the beach. As they walked, Sean probed for more details about Traveler’s work. “What do you consider your most valuable contribution to the Core – to the Cranium?” asked the analyst.

“Frankly, I come to many conclusions that I choose not to upload to the Cranial Reservoir.”

 “You remain covert? You withhold information?” queried the analyst, almost, but not quite accusingly.

“That is one thing I would never willingly do: withhold a discovery that would make life better for all.  But there is significant danger in serving up truth before the time is right. Precipitous truth could cause a Lady MacBeth situation on your hands.

“You understand the process, of course.  After much research and observation, information is uploaded / teleported to the Reservoir. Everyone has access to the Reservoir — and the Cranium, but few go to the bother to digest and think.  It is much easier to let others digest the information and broadcast it in 60-second sound bites.  Besides, the process to final truth and familiarity with the Universal Cranium is life-long and seems unrewarding to the average seeker.

“Once the information reaches the Cranium, it goes through an extensive process.  Anything that is not precise truth is sloughed off. Unscrupulous – or maybe just ignorant- individuals harvest the debris and make their living – and their power – from it. It is this detritus in the hands of well-meaning, but misguided individuals that can inadvertently cause spiritual abuse or emotional abuse.  Detritus adds a lot of pressure, stress to the lives of sensitive souls. I want to be overly careful. That is why I withhold; until I am sure – sure that everything I upload is precise – so that I do not add to the detritus.

“There are things that people believe so heartily to be truth they would stake their life on it – maybe your life too.  For instance: you must have meat and eggs for breakfast before you have pie.” Traveler paused, and then asked the rhetorical question, “Is it wise to eat a healthful breakfast before pie?  Yes.  Might an omelet serve the purpose just as well – or better- than biscuits and gravy?” Traveler raised his eyebrows into question marks.

The analyst gave a rueful smile.

Traveler continued, “Is it imperative that children respect their parents? Yes. Must adult children follow every word of advice that falls from the lips of antiquated ancestors in order to show that respect?” Traveler paused for a moment and let the question hover. “Myths that hold the essence of truth may cause simple minds to make a shrine of the shell.  They worship the vehicle of truth rather than the truth. They make sacred the cow rather than simply being nourished by the meat.”

It was not often Sean Journey found himself in the presence of someone both safe and intellectual. He proffered a rare insight from his personal life. “I respect my dad for his philosophical, good-hearted patience and perseverance. I love my mother because she gave birth to me and nourished me, meeting my basic needs when I was young. But very seldom do I find it comfortable to visit Castle Rook.”

In a Music Town: The Side-Hustle

It is more truth than myth, the idea that struggling musicians, actors, and opera aspirants work in a deli while waiting for a big break. It is vintage legend and it is just as true today in any music city as it was 100 years ago. New York, New Orleans, L.A. Durango. Yes, Durango. I heard the tourists talking as I sat at the piano at Jean-Pierre French Bakery during the recent Blue-Grass Meltdown. They were talking about the prolific amount of musical talent in such a small town – especially the pianists. Very true. The Strater Hotel anchors the other end of the same block as Jean-Pierre and boasts two restaurants and one saloon. The Diamond Belle Saloon is historic and famous and houses a grand old upright piano.  During the season – May through October – there is a continuous line-up of ragtime pianists playing every night of the week.   The most famous is Adam Swanson – four-time World Champion Old-Time piano player. Another piano man appearing regularly at the Diamond Belle is Daryl Kuntz. He and his brother have been in the movies. Daryl also plays piano one morning a week at Jean-Pierre. I cover Saturday and Sunday mornings.

For my side-hustle, I administer the private lessons schedule at Stillwater Music.

So I get to meet them, 25 or 30 of these aspiring and practicing professional musicians, as they carry out another traditional side-hustle of musicians – private lesson teacher.

She is a musical theater major, an opera singer headed to graduate school, and she gives voice lessons three days a week to students of all ages, five-year-old Disney princesses to 65-year-old choral singers. She also cleans houses to supplement her living – and walks dogs – and works evenings in a liquor store.

He is a coffee barista who manages one of the many, many hip coffee shops in Durango. He also is an accomplished fingerstyle guitarist who plays, bass, mandolin, and uke. Other musicians refer to him with the nickname Prophet of Jazz. He has not always been in Durango, but he always comes back.

He is a much revered, most veteran of piano teachers; so laid back he could be a bass player. He has toured with his guitar, finished his piano degree as a young adult and married man, and sometimes takes time off to attend his son’s soccer games. His son also plays cello. His daughter; piano. He used to take time off to tour with Chevel Shepherd on keys and guitar. I am not sure whether being a sought after gigging musician and recording studio staple is his side hustle or weather teaching 32 students a week is his side hustle. But either way, he is making a full-time living in music.

She will ride in the Iron Horse Bicycle Classic tomorrow – all the way to Silverton – on a bicycle – racing the train. She only graduated college a year or so ago – with a double major. She has 30 piano students and is dedicated to giving them her best. As a side hustle she accompanies for the local middle school and works mornings at the golf-course. She will leave for graduate school in the fall, but she will keep as many of her students as possible online, because even in graduate school, you’ve got to have a side-hustle.

Tip It Forward

She spent a lifetime raising young musicians. And when I say a lifetime, I mean all her adult years. I guess you could say for the 21 years previous to adulthood she was only raising one young musician – herself – but that would not accurately account for her parents’ hand in the business. Anyway, she raised three – musicians that is – three to whom she gave birth (this story is not about the hundreds of students whom she raised to love music) and she watched them fledge and fly away and continue forward with the music business because each of them, at the approximate age of 16 began to play with bands; marching bands, rock bands, punk bands, reggae bands, celtic bands, worship bands; every kind of music one could imagine. Likewise, these young musicians began to be independent, to learn more from the big wide world of music, less from the mom who gave them birth and especially they learned from the School of Hard Knocks and paying your dues. So it happened, after they were grown from home, that whenever she passed a street musician – which was usually when traveling to San Francisco or Pike Place or other colorful and cultural locations, she was careful to tip the musician – a little change here, a dollar bill there because she was never flush with money. And each time she dropped the money in the hat, she thought of her kids; wished them well. She hoped that someone, somewhere that day was dropping some money in the hat or jar or fishbowl for her children who were making a way for themselves with music.

***

He was born three weeks early and came out using his lungs and with the ability to grasp and grip objects. His parents sang a cappella harmonies while his mother nursed him. A few days later he could roll over. Before the age of five weeks he was pushing himself up to a standing position in his mother’s lap. This in itself seemed precocious. But the amazing thing was, he was pushing himself up, bouncing, keeping accurate time to the rhythmic crooning of a traveling black music evangelist. Six months later she boarded a city bus in San Antonio with this little man child held securely in her arms. She was only 19 and a little skittish of the big city, strange surroundings, people and customs different from hers. An old woman with a large and worn shopping bag occupied the seat behind causing her to think of all sorts of fairy tales with old hags. Across the aisle sat a young Puerto Rican looking desperate and hungry, she knew too much about Westside Story. She tried to make herself as inconspicuous as possible, to melt into the bus interior. But Baby would have none of that. He squirmed until he was turned to face the Puerto Rican. He stuck out his little cherub face and coughed politely. No result. Determined, Baby coughed again. The young Puerto Rican man finally looked up, whereupon Baby beamed at him and then turned his attention to the weathered woman behind to begin the social process of introduction again. Working the crowd. That was 47 years ago. To her certain knowledge, that child has been a consummate showman and performer ever since. He loves people. He reads the crowd.

Child number two had to be rocked to sleep standing up, the one who watched the patterns of the LED music readout on the stereo over her shoulder to make sure the music was not stopping, only advancing to the next song. This made sense. This child was born to parents who worked in radio and had a mortal fear of dead air time. She was the dancer who moved her arms gracefully to the music before she could walk, the toddler who sat at a piano keyboard and attempted delicate arpeggios instead of pounding. As a young adult she was the drummer, the mandolin player, the songwriter and the one woman show.

Child number three was born using his lungs and never stopped. Always self-contained, mindful and confident, he knew what was expected of him and delivered on stage by the age of five. His pitch was as sure and accurate as that of his older siblings. He was able to engage adults in meaningful conversation at a young age. He toured the world with a children’s chorale, sang for weddings, and soloed on the concert hall stage before entering high school. As a young adult he knew his path and located himself in music hubs, playing concurrently with as many bands as possible.

***

So now, when she plays the Saturday and Sunday morning gig at the French Bakery, she thinks of her kids. She thinks how encouraging they are – all three of them- how excited for her that she has this unencumbered opportunity to play live music, enter this world they have survived in and loved for decades. She thinks of her oldest child when she makes eye-contact, smiles and acknowledges each guest that comes through the door while she continues to play. She is pretty sure she learned that habit from her son. She thinks of her daughter and a one-woman show as she keeps the music humming without benefit of drum or guitar fills for a few solid hours. When happy guests tip her handsomely – and when they don’t, she thinks of the seasons her kids were busking on the streets to survive. She recalls the street musicians she has tipped over the years. And she wishes, she wishes she had tipped more – tipped it a little further forward!

Motivating the Challenged

I love it when people get their needs met; the perfect meal, a soul mate love, a forever home, a fulfilling job, the “ah, ha!” moment in education when the light goes on – the one thing that satisfies so fully it propels them on to fuller life.

I am fascinated by what makes people tick, Mozart and the brain, how to reach students with ADHD, learning to speak another person’s learning language be it visual, auditory, kinesthetic.

So I watched with interest as a young man marketed a breakthrough in how to reach Aspergers.

In a nutshell? Meet their needs. The young man displayed an Aspergers sensory funnel model (which juxtaposes nicely with Maslow’s hierarchy of needs) and explained how students, children and people in general learn or receive optimally once you meet their basic needs.

It is a compelling thought for teachers and caretakers, yet something in me still asks, Who meets the needs of the caretakers of the world? Have they no needs?

Are the caretakers complete and perfect persons? Those who have already arrived? In every type relationship, reciprocity must happen. There is a payoff, a reward of some type.

I love being a caretaker, I really do. But, there comes a time my well is empty. Who refills my well? Can I do it alone? Everybody needs a reward-a payoff.

What is your payoff? Money? Prestige? Power? Acknowledgement? Love? Applause? Feeling good about yourself? What motivates you?

Two Musical Untruths and the Excellence of Pentatonix

I never had a favorite band.

Wait.  That’s not quite true.  As a person whose tag line is often, raising young musicians, I have had numerous favorite bands.

I’ve never purchased a ticket to a live concert before.

That too, is incorrect.

I paid my own way into more than a spate of excellent Colorado Children’s Chorale performances and winning Conifer High School Marching Band competitions. I have bartered, finagled and roadied my way into fog-machine-filled venues and housed bands in my basement.

Kevin at the Mesa, 2010
Kevin at the Mesa, 2010

But those memories are long ago and far away.  In every case, I was acquainted with someone in the band and the band knew me.

This is the first time I have avidly followed a band where I did not know the performers personally and none of them even knew I existed.

When I was young, I never had a heartthrob celebrity musician.  No Shaun and David Cassidys.  No Bobby Sherman.  The Justin Biebers of my youth were unrealistic and inaccessible to me and I knew it.

Precisely because I did raise young musicians, I was privileged numerous glimpses, backstage and frontstage, of the level of excellence possible-and the price of achieving it. Because I operated mom’s taxi far and wide to deliver a youthful male soprano to multiple performance locations, because I was the one who laundered and pressed wardrobe every night during the heavy Christmas performance season, I understand what type of all-inclusive family commitment it takes to launch a superstar.

Philip (center) and Colorado Children's Chorale wardrobe closet
Philip (center) and Colorado Children’s Chorale wardrobe closet

I get the idea of all consuming: eat, drink and breathe music in order to be one-take wonders.  It is for those reasons and more I revere Pentatonix.

I stumbled on them accidentally post Sing Off 2011 and I watched Sing Off clips over and over.  I chuckled at Video Killed the Radio Star and truly came to believe The Dog Days Are Over.  I pressed repeat on the deserved compliments from Shawn Stockman.  It was impressed upon me that three of them were 19 – the age of my youngest son at the time. Like a high school girl, I sleuthed through biographies and YouTube and found the lead trio attended high school together.  Be still my beating heart.  What would it have been like to be their music teacher?  To have those three in my class?  YouTube also yielded the depth of multi-talent, experience and character for Avi and Kevin – the rhythm section – who are, coincidentally, my daughter’s age.

It is fitting I have a favorite band. I need excellence in my life.  I will pursue it, laud it, achieve it.

To that end, I purchased a best seat available ticket to a Pentatonix concert and betook myself to Orem Utah by private motor coach (which, in the common vernacular means I drove my Subaru).

Only briefly was there quiet enough to hear the close velvet harmonies and sonorous intertwining of finely exercised and tuned vocal cords. But I did get to witness the deafening roar of the crowd and unmitigated appreciation for five über talented performers.

Excellence can and should have its reward and I am satisfied.

Pentatonix concert Orem UT March 2015
Pentatonix concert Orem UT March 2015

 

 

 

The worst two years of my life

“It was the worst two years of my life,” he said.  We all have years like that, times we would rather forget, places we never revisit in our minds.

Recently, I was able to catch up with a former colleague. Not just any former officemate, but someone who had made a difference in my life – made me a better person, improved my perspective on the world in general. You know the type, the go-to person in your organization, the recognized leader whether boss or peer.  Unfortunately, they are rare.  Yet fortunately for me, I can count a handful over the years.

On my way to a degree in organizational management, we talked about these folks, learned they were not necessarily the ones with the title (although they can be) but the ones with competence, professionalism, character – the real leaders regardless of rank – the influencers.

It is always a good idea to be on cordial terms with coworkers.  Just like houseguests, some make us happy by their coming and others by their going. According to a textbook with the scary title, “Praxis of Organizational Health,” research shows it is the people you work with who govern your perception of whether you rank it a good job or a bad job.

I spent a few years working alongside a boss who was so diplomatic it was said he could tell someone they were wrong and do it in such a way they left feeling complimented. You naturally want to keep touch with someone like that, to continue to enjoy the mentorship crumbs that fall from the table.

I am also fortunate to have had colleagues who made a job bearable because of their presence, demeanor, personality, sense of humor, and commitment to excellence. Such was the colleague with whom I recently reconnected. I attempted to convey my gratitude for his positive influence.

“Thank you for saying that,” he responded with quiet emotion, “those were the worst two years of my life.”

Yet, during those same two years, he had made my job covetable. I want to be like that.  I want it to be inherent in my character.

Heartaches happen; losses, divorces, deaths, illnesses, false accusations, rejections – the worst year or years of our life (may they be kept to a minimum).

Even in my own misery, I want to go on making the world a better place for others.

 

 

A Positive Influence

I love the words, influence and negotiation. Influence makes the world a better place. The desired outcome of negotiation is a win-win for all parties concerned.  I have a thirst for Knowledge and Information.  Knowledge and Information lead to success in life.

But when influence is used chiefly to get one’s own way rather than for the positive benefit of the world at large, there is a line where the influence of leadership or the influence of friendship crosses into manipulation, manipulation to intimidation, intimidation to coercion.

Disparaging, shaming, insulting, uncomfortable to receive; manipulation and intimidation shut down choice.  Sometimes, the only label we know to put on it is political. Office politics. Family politics.

The Influence Junkie hatches an idea and sets about to confirm the validity of his or her idea by how many people can be talked into jumping on the bandwagon.  Having fanned the flame, the influence junkie walks away triumphant -may even forget the idea – while keeping the feeling of victory and leaving in their wake some sensitive and fragile folks feeling obligated.  Others are depleted for having had to defer or outright decline.

When you tried to negotiate with me, did you let it dissolve into shame, name-calling or manipulation?  If so, you lost a piece of your character and I received a wound.  That is not win-win.

When you meant to influence me to see it your way, did you respect my opinion? Or were you meddling?  Did you resort to irritation and anger, or infer I was bird-brained, because I did not agree with you?

Keep it positive and we will have a more excellent relationship.

Information and Knowledge influence. Gossip is not the same as Information and Knowledge. Gossip bullies are adept at spreading hoax, rumor and panic.  Gossip bullies get overwrought by something they hear on the news or the grapevine. Soaring on the yeast of self-righteousness, the gossip spreads the word and walks away feeling uplifted.  They have done their duty for the cause.

Caution:  Surgical mask required for great relationships. People around you whose emotional systems have been compromised are struggling to manage depression, other mental illnesses, migraines and high blood pressure. Keep that guard over your mouth.

Healthy influence makes the world a better place.

The outcome of healthy negotiation is win-win.

The value of amassing information and knowledge lies in a deeper understanding.

Influence. Negotiate.  Inform. Teach.  Refrain from berating – and that will lead to more excellent relationships.