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When Sunday restores the soul

Do you take a regular day off each week? One out of seven? Two out of seven? What do you do with that day off, totally off?

I grew up in a home that went beyond luxuriating in Sunday as a day of relaxation. My family of origin enforced Sunday as a day of rest. No sports. No games. No reading of secular material. Just attendance at Sunday School and Church, preparation and cleanup of a large family meal. Yes, Sunday was an enforced day of rest and as such, a day marked by ennui, often headachy, making me squirm with a longing to get something done.

These days I am still prone to that extreme of getting something done. There are always things that somebody has got to do. If I don’t do them, who will? I am guilty of checking things off the list at the expense of not taking a day – not even one of seven – for rest. My soul shrivels. My vision is constricted.

My spirits were on the brink of shriveling when I woke in a motel room, 200 miles from home, having successfully completed a vendor fair the evening before. Nothing to do? No excuse for not taking a day of rest.

Posey Lake is 18 miles up the Hell’s Backbone Road from Escalante. It was mid-September and the colors, oh the colors, were glorious!

IMG_2379poseylakeOnce I got to the lake, I sat on the boat dock for some minutes, just wasting time. Then, I did the logical thing and took a hike all the way around the lake, startling myself and cattle along the way. Once on the other side, I noticed a trail leading to a lookout. However steep, who can resist a trail? A trail leading to a CCC built fire lookout in Dixie National Forest? Even more delectable.

At first, I took only pictures. The aspens and the conifers were ravishingly colorful.

IMG_2384tallredaspenThen, a few more paces along the trail and I began to shed the layers of photographer, writer, or analytical business woman. With wild abandon, I went on a tree-hugging spree. I sniffed out a Ponderosa (searching for that faint vanilla). I hugged the ponderosa. Then I hugged an aspen. Then a very young blue spruce. And finally I ended up in the arms of an Englemann.

And, at the top, at the lookout, I found an entire colorful panorama stretching for hundreds of miles.

It was Sunday. I had a day off. A day to relax. A day for spiritual renewal. I went further up the mountain.

And my soul, o my soul, was refreshed

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Backpacking across airports

Preparing to travel for work is a lot like planning to hike in the early morning. I skipped my morning walk in order to make my flight. But I didn’t miss out on exercise, no. I packed my carryon and personal items carefully so as to have everything necessary at hand. Just like a planned hike, I charted my course the night before, discarding what I didn’t need for this trip and adding items unique to planned activities. No camp stove. No fuel. Yes to the layers. Yes to only one laptop. With not so much as a lipstick duplicated, I traveled without excess baggage.

I strapped on my hiking sandals in preparation for a fast walk between terminals.

My electronics and usual purse contents were stowed in my laptop backpack. Clothes and toiletries in my carefully, linear measured roller bag. No checked baggage for me. I knew I would have to make a run for it in Phoenix to catch the direct connection to Orlando.

But pockets! Where are the pockets? Why does business casual dress code translate to no pockets for a woman? No pockets in my short pencil skirts and no pockets in skinny dress pants and no pockets in collared and scarved suitable tops. If this was truly a hiking trip, there would be pockets. A deep pocket for my cellphone / camera. A pocket for my keys. A zippered pocket for my credit card. A hidden pocket for my ID. What distresses me is, I didn’t notice this lack of pockets until after I parked my car at the airport and felt for somewhere to stow the keys, cell phone and boarding pass. If this really was a hiking trip, there would be bandanas – several bandanas. With bandanas I could be innovative. If this were a real hiking trip I would know that my snack food was in the upper pouch of my backpack and my emergency provisions were deep in the bag. Furthermore, I wouldn’t have to pull out my shampoo and other toiletries and food at every checkpoint. I wouldn’t have to take off my shoes and go barefoot through security.

Still thinking myself a savvy traveler despite the omission of pockets, I strode confidently forward.

At least I am wearing my hiking sandals – the ones I normally slosh right on through shallow washes and creeks in, and they come quickly off at each checkpoint.

In Phoenix all my well-laid plans and preparation were foiled. The airline changed the boarding gate on me, thus nullifying my pre-boarding pass and my pre-screening security pass and entailing another 3 quarters of a mile hike and yet another pass through high security – and yes, for some reason I was also treated to the wand and a pat down, which further delayed. By the time I reached the gate that bird had flown.

I put a lot of miles on my feet that day, but when I arrived in Philadelphia at 9:00 pm – which was plan “C” or “D,” or maybe even “E,” I arrived without baggage. Does that ever happen on an outdoor hiking trip? Oh, you may lay your bag at the side of the trail when you walk off to water a tree, but you pick it back up when you find the trail. Or if you forget, you notice quite soon and trudge back for it (I once hiked an extra mile each way for a camera that slipped out – but that is another story). Some of you will chide that I should never let it leave my hand. But in Phoenix, as I boarded a full plane for Philadelphia where I had never planned to go – with the eighth group – all our roller bags were taken from us – mandatory – and checked on through to our final destination. Sometimes you really can’t take it with you.

But I did have a coat – backpacking has taught me something. Even though I was booked directly to Florida, I had stuff-sacked my down jacket into the last remaining space beside my MacAir. For that, I was thankful at 4:00 am the next morning. The lack of toothbrush, I could circumvent, but what to do with the contacts during a needed sleep? If I had my hiking daypack, I would have my contact lens case. It fits right in there with the extra pair of dry socks and the matches. Once again, preparation for a fourteener differs from airport backpacking. My contact lens case had checked on through to Florida with my shampoo and all my clothes and underwear.

If you must know, I slept in a hotel towel. I rose the next morning and popped my contacts back in, moistened only by water. I arrived back at the airport at 5:00 am – 2:00 am back home. I successfully landed in Florida and arrived at the hotel precisely 24 hours later than planned. My bag, with all the pocketless business casual items arrived an additional 24 hours later. But it did arrive! And I did make it home five days later without a hiccup. I even successfully caught my first Uber to the airport and gate checked my roller bag for the final leg in order to bring home freebies from the gathering to the waiting office staff.

But what do I prefer? I prefer the 11- mile hikes into red sandstone or cool lakes and conifers. I think I’ll keep my feet on the ground for awhile.

The headwaters of the Everglades? That will do for a morning walk
The headwaters of the Everglades? That will do for a morning walk.

Nature Brings Me Flowers

You don’t bring me flowers;

You don’t sing me love songs; . . .

You don’t bring me flowers anymore. (Diamond/Bergman)

Wild flower season at Cedar Breaks National Monument
Wild flower season at Cedar Breaks National Monument

I love to get outside in Nature. I don’t know if there is anything I love better than a long hike in a beautiful place. Let me name a few: Crag Crest, O Be Joyful, Bear Creek, Hanging Lake, Angel’s Landing; the list is long.

On the day these photos were taken, it was Ramparts Overlook in Cedar Breaks. I love Nature because Nature loves me back. Nature is harsh, you will say. Nature is cruel. In fact, Nature can kill you. I will not deny it. But, think about it for a moment, Love – or rather what you did for love or what you would do for love- is sometimes harsh and Love is sometimes cruel, but Love is the solid bedrock of everything we hold dear as a society – and my love affair with Nature is a foundation that keeps me healthy physically as well as emotionally, mentally and spiritually.

Let me ask you, would you rather die outside in a beautiful place by the hand of Nature or in a heap of twisted metal in the city? What are the odds? I’ll stack the odds in favor of Nature. I’ll keep getting out there. Nature, rather than commerce and metro traffic, shall decide when it is my time to go.

Would you rather be in a sterile gray hospital room when they pull the plug and you breathe your last, or would you rather be struck by lightning on a green, rocky, stairway to heaven? I’ll choose lightning.

I was made from dust and to dust I shall return. Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. I’ll trust Nature. Nature loves me back. Nature brings me flowers.

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There is a marmot in the tree
There is a marmot in the tree

Too Hot To Hike

“It’s so beautiful,” They told me before I moved here. “Think of the lake and the red rocks!” Yes. The desert has its own kind of beauty even to one accustomed to pine trees and aspens. Undeniably such a large volume of water right in the midst of the desert is a thing of wonder. It is beautiful. But it is hot. So hot that a coveted morning hike turns into merely a walk that must be taken before 6:00 am. So rocky and barren I must drive an hour or two to find a shady canyon in which to stretch my legs on the weekend.

What do you do to pick yourself up when you are down? When you are blue, how do you make yourself feel better? If you are agitated, how do you calm yourself? How do you engage in self care – manage your mental and emotional health?

Making ourselves feel better is how we cope. What is your coping mechanism? Do you gravitate toward a crowd? Have a cigarette? Music? Sex? What makes you feel all better? How we cope can become an addition. Who doesn’t want to feel better all the time? I do. So when I feel myself ready to drop into that downward spiral, I walk. I run out the door and hit the trail. But it is hot. Too hot to hike.

Having once discovered the piñon-pine forests of Navajo National Monument (established 1909), I returned again to hike all the short trails and snap more photos. The most popular of the short trails will take you to an overlook from which you can see Betakin in the distance. A second trail descends down the side of an inverted mountain. Beginning at 7,000 feet, the inverted mountain goes down, down to where the canyon floor hosts similar flora to that normally found high up a mountainside – an aspen forest and conifer trees. It was cooler here and with a more regular source of moisture. It has to be to grow aspen trees. This type of canyon is situated such that parts of it never see the sun. So narrow one of the sides is always in the shade. The snow is slow to melt.

And suddenly, I knew the answer to the oft asked question as to why the Anasazi were cliff dwellers rather than living up top where it appears life would have been easier-less precipitous. And now, I understand why certain folks mourn the loss of Glen Canyon as was, and want to drain Lake Powell.

It is too hot to hike – except in lush, deep, narrow canyons.

Betakin at Navajo National Monument
Betakin at Navajo National Monument
Inverted mountain
Inverted mountain

A daily walk at 6:00 am

It was the perfect setting for an early morning walk. The sun perched, ready to rise behind the far distant lake and rocks. Shards of light illuminated the leftover clouds from a midnight storm. Blooms lingered on desert willows. On the pavement, I was passing through a section of exquisitely detailed high-end southwestern homes.

Twenty feet away from me a full-grown jackrabbit paused and posed, silhouetted in front of an iron arch complete with some sort of desert vine, ears upright and transparent in the sunrise like the hoodoos of Bryce Canyon during a 6:00 am entrance to Queens Garden. I looked and longed beyond the rabbit to the vanishing point far, far away in lake and rocks. And I had no camera. I have long ceased to carry it in my own neighborhood. What could possibly be different one day to the next?

Unexpectedly, a much-desired, long Saturday hike

I worked on Saturday. It was not my sixth day of work because I did have actual Fourth of July off.

I seized an opportunity to take our customer service specialist, Brandice, and make a Cannonville / Escalante delivery and introduce her around. For efficiency and beauty, we took Cottonwood Canyon Road full-well knowing we would probably need to return via the highway due to gathering clouds.

It rained while we were in Escalante. But when we returned through Cannonville, the skies, ground and roadways were dry and there was a sunny path of blue sky down Cottonwood Canyon. Knowing from experience it would put us home 40 minutes earlier, we took it.

To give some perspective, Google says it is 160 miles Page to Cannonville via the paved highway and 46 miles via Cottonwood Canyon – albeit slow going and winding dirt road.

We exited the paved road south of Cannonville at Kodachrome State Park and proceeded 18 more miles to pass the turnoff for Grosvenor Arch. So far, so good. A couple raindrops hit the windshield. Bear in mind, we are already more than 20 miles in for a trip we believe is 46 slow miles – oh wait – now they tell me it is 56 miles – from Grosvenor to highway 89. Anyway, we went UP the washboardy hills and UP more washboardy hills and then descended into an area nick-named “Candyland” because of the colorful rock formations. It was beautiful. But then, the descent down the slightly rained on slope was slick. Moreover, it stuck to the new tires like clay, making them perform like bald tires. We slid sideways in the 15 – passenger van. There was a slight but muddy ravine on our right. Enough! We knew we would have to stop and wait this out. Typically the road dries out fast – by the next day. It was six pm. We were expected home.

When it stopped raining, I climbed to the top of the nearest steep and muddy hill until I got one bar of cell service. I texted the boss. No immediate answer. I called the boss. He picked up on the fourth ring. Can you back up north? He asked. No. The dark rain clouds had now cut us off behind.

I’d love to say I’ll be there in 90 minutes, he said, but I am at Antelope Point (ten miles the other side of town) and I’ll have to go by home and get my rescue equipment.

Can you call Brandice’s husband and let him know? I asked. Affirmative. Text me the phone number.

Brandice shouted me the number from the distant van. I slid back down the hill and we enjoyed a nice tailgate repast of veggies, fruit and guac. I hiked back up the hill to see if there were further messages. Nada. But, the road looked pretty good from that vantage point. While I was hiking, Brandice had been busy peeling mud from the tires with a sharp rock. We began inching our way down the road in 200-yard segments. Here is how it worked:

I ran ahead to reconnoiter and then signal Brandice forward to a specific place. As she drew near, I ran ahead once more to see if all was safe around the corner. In this way, we avoided sinkholes and slippery narrow slopes. Sometimes we waited 15 or 20 minutes for the road to dry out.

Meanwhile, the boss texted his location. He was now on the dirt road. His pathway was dry. For several miles. Then he hit the muddy, fish-tailing mid-section.

By the time the Martins came over the hill we had made a few miles progress in the van. Yes. Martin plural. When the boss Martin met us, who should pop out his passenger door but Martin the husband of Brandice? Two shovels and a garden hoe made quick work of clay removal from the tires.

Being the grown-up boy scout, WFR and general all around MacGyver that he is, the boss leap-frogged van and Trooper through the sketchy places while I picked up slack on the passable. We made it home by 10:00 pm.

Aside from the embarrassment of having to call for help, I had a fabulous adventure in a beautiful place. You see, the clouds and rain made it a glorious temperature for hiking – up the hill for a cell signal and up and down the road for blazing a trail – in one of the most beautiful places of this region.

Unexpectedly, I got my much-desired, long Saturday hike.

But, still and all, I have a new rule for myself: No dirt road driving when there is rain anywhere in the state. – – Until we get knobbier tires on the van.

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My MacBook Smells Like Campfire

My MacBook Pro smells a little like a campfire. Proof positive of a working adventure.

I had resolved not to leave town on a holiday weekend – not even go into town to the office if I could help it. Traffic is brutal in recreation areas during the busy season. There is such a passing frenzy on two-lane highways. Your odds of a head on collision – or rolling your car off-road to avoid one- are extremely high.

I don’t need that kind of stress. Nevertheless, as Memorial Day approached, I realized I would be alone. I am accustomed to parades and car shows, and baseball, and family cookouts on Memorial Day.

Now solitude is one of my comforts, but I also love to laugh. Laughter usually takes two. My family and best friends are in Colorado. My work friends have seen more than enough of me this past week. Besides, holidays for them mean tossing shots and swinging drunk in the backyard. As much as I enjoy a good swing set, drunkenness is not my forte.

As it turned out, instead of shots, I had marshmallows toasted over an open fire, watermelon toted in a cooler, hotdogs roasted on my pocket stove, and great conversation.

I got to see my daughter looking extremely well in borrowed clothes, sporting a river tan on her knees and making lovely music with mandolin and voice. Making mature, well-honed, performance-ready music around a campfire – while I made an office of picnic table, cell-phone and laptop.

After she played through a mini-repertoire of songs ranging from Johnny Cash through Amazing Grace and some cutting edge originals, she obligingly chopped and split our neighbors’ wood tender. They shared their fire. We enjoyed marshmallows, and played games with those three neighbors as the embers died.

We broke camp the next morning and headed back through that persistently impatient traffic to work day worlds. In my workday world I will design and buy merchandise and insist on customer service that insures visitors have a great outdoor experience. In her world, she will fearlessly guide wanderers down river on a raft; or lead strangers into deeper spirituality through her music.

Have I said recently that I raise young musicians? They are all grown up now and each responsible and laudable in his or her own right for musical expertise. I can no longer take credit for their virtuosity. What a joy to know that each of my children travels through life making substantive music; all the while keeping body and shelter viable through creative endeavor.

Don’t quit on your travel – Keep putting one foot in front of the other

Don’t quit on your enjoyment of Nature – Keep loving the great outdoor activities

Don’t quit your day job – You need it to fund the activities you love

And don’t quit on your music!

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A Walk at 5:00 am

Wylie Coyote crosses your paved path on a furtive sunrise mission. Bushes previously bearing every semblance to willows have burst into orchid–like bloom. A light desert perfume fills the air. And the birds, the birds each in their native language are calling, screaming, whooping and chortling at the top of their lungs. One last cool breeze of late spring causes you to raise your thin hoodie to cover neck and ears. The sun peeps over a barren movie set laden with monoliths and monuments and you, yourself, cast a long, very long shadow.

 

And I Will Rest in Peace

Sun warmed the trailhead and I discussed with myself whether to take my down jacket. The name of the destination – Mossy Cave – evoked a feeling of coolness. It was not yet mid-March. I left the down behind and donned my paper-thin athletic jacket pulled from my daypack. Fifty strides ahead, mounds of snow lay in the shadows. Half mile brought me to a frozen waterfall. The sun still shone and Nature was gloriously beautiful. I was moderately high – in elevation. I began to think of dying.

You see, my bucket list consists primarily of visiting as many National Parks, Monuments and other naturally beautiful spots as possible – with a hearty helping of music and ethnic food, and love thrown in along the way. The grand finale item of my bucket list states: Die in a beautiful place. Therefore, I am careful not to linger long in barren places. One never knows the day or hour. The litmus test of the beauty of any place becomes, “Am I content to die here?”

The entirety of Highway 12 is a scenic byway. Highway 12 cuts right through a corner of Bryce Canyon; a large chunk of the Kaiparowits and Canyons districts of Grand Staircase-Escalante; and ends only after threading its way through Capitol Reef. I have been eyeing a hike in the Bryce Canyon corner of Highway 12 for an entire year. Today, with perfect timing, I discovered a vacant parking space at the trailhead.

Hiking never ceases to make me grateful to be alive, thankful for my life. To hike in warm sun, beneath blue skies makes me fall in love again – with Nature and Life. When you love Nature, Nature loves you back. I hugged a tree, just because it smelled so good. It was a Ponderosa. Essence of vanilla sap was my companion for the rest of the day. Every bend in the trail, every switchback felt like an old friend. My internal compass experienced déjà vu, evoked memories of other trails with this exact angle.

Yes, Nature loves me back, but hiking does not stave off the yearning and longing. I longed to lay myself down on slickrock and bake in the sun, to roll in the grasses and shrubs, to be wrapped up in sandstone dirt and pine needles. And that is why I know; when my time comes and those humans who love me scatter my ashes in a beautiful place; I will rest in peace.

Bridge to Mossy Cave, Bryce Canyon
Bridge to Mossy Cave, Bryce Canyon
Snowmelt feeds a waterfall
Snowmelt feeds a waterfall
Hoodoos have arches too
Hoodoos have arches too

Landscape from a Working Woman’s Perspective; My Favorite Commute

My favorite work commute is Cottonwood Canyon. Ostensibly I came to Page, Arizona to work as a buyer and retail manager, but my underlying motive was to move a bit further down the Colorado River – to see ever more of the great outdoors and sandstone terrain. I knew the job would require a healthy amount of travel, calling on and merchandising seven small non-profit bookstores spread across southern Utah and Northern Arizona. The imperative inherent in the job description was to get to know the landscape of the public lands within my jurisdiction of Glen Canyon Natural History Association. Once I understood the area, I would design and order merchandise that interpreted the landscape; a mug here, a T-shirt there, all merchandise to help educate, tangible trinkets to take home as talismans, memory triggers of time spent in Glen Canyon National Recreation Area or Grand Staircase Escalante.

My business route takes me on a sweeping grand circle of sorts. Down past Navajo Bridge, Lee’s Ferry, Lonely Dell Ranch; Up Highway 89A to Kanab; passing turnoffs to North Rim of the Grand Canyon and Pipe Spring; Highway 89 past the turnoffs to Zion and Cedar Breaks; Across Highway 12 past Bryce Canyon; several stops within Grand Staircase Escalante and through Capitol Reef, a detour to Bullfrog and Hall’s Crossing; Highway 90 with Natural Bridges in view as well as the buttes that are the Bears Ears; possibly 261 through Cedar Mesa and down the Moki Dugway to 191; continuing on Highway 191 to join Highways 163 and 160; and back to Page. It takes several days to drive this loop, more than a week if I called on all the stores in one trip.  I prefer smaller loops. Along this route there are numerous opportunities to choose other back roads and lessor known shortcuts.

My favorite work commute is Cottonwood Canyon. When you take Cottonwood Canyon you experience a variety of colors and geological features. You get out and away from the paved road and any traffic. You can usually go there in a regular car (not so if it is raining or has recently been raining).

All the colors of a commute up Cottonwood Canyon
All the colors of a commute up Cottonwood Canyon

There is no early morning drive I like better than that dirt and gravel road. It gets me to Cannonville 40 minutes quicker than taking the paved route through Kanab and it gives me a panorama of beauty, a kaleidoscope of ever-changing light and colors of sandstone.

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Grovesner Arch soon after sunrise

If you have the luxury of a day off rather than a business commute, several beautiful trailheads are accessed along the way and there is even a written guide to the Geology of Cottonwood Canyon to interpret the rock layers you see. Cottonwood Narrows is a spectacular little hike that can be done in minutes short of an hour if you have a car waiting at the opposite trailhead. If not, double your time and hike back the way you came in, or walk back to your car on the dirt road. On your hike you will enjoy both shadow and sunshine, a little bit of narrow slot canyon, and you might even see a few small arches in the rock walls towering to either side.

Hiking in The Narrows of Cottonwood Canyon
Hiking in The Narrows of Cottonwood Canyon